He who is in me is greater than he who is in the world!

I had quite an encounter with the Lord recently that I thought was worth sharing.  The other night, while leaving a prayer meeting, I saw a lady across the street from the church who, to me, appeared to be stranded.  Maybe astray is a better word.  When I see people living out of their car like that, my immediate reaction is that they are bound and need Jesus to save them and set them free.  The thought doesn't ever occur to me that maybe they actually want their lives to be that way.  So my sister in the Lord and I venture over to her, totally equipped with the message of Salvation.  It's been my experience that people like that are usually in need of something, whether it be a healing touch, an act of service, or whatever God wants to do.  This woman didn't want any of that!  In fact, she didn't even want to tell me her name.  She did clarify to me that she was a reverend and had saints that were scattered abroad.  That should have been my first clue but instead, I was thinking, "Oh! she loves Jesus! Let's share in the Gospel a bit and glorify God."  (After all, God loves it when we sit around and talk about how awesome He is!)  Well, she didn't want to talk about the Gospel, instead, she wanted to grill me whole! 

I'll be the first to admit, I have a lot to learn!  I'm no stranger to that fact, especially when it comes to people.  It was a really good thing that my sister, who is  more like a mother in the Lord, was there paying attention to what was going on, it was a good lesson for both of us.  At some point during our conversation, I started feeling really confused.  This woman claimed to "know" Jesus and even be filled with the Holy Spirit, yet she couldn't say that Jesus was born from a virgin OR that He now sits at the right hand of the Father.  There were a few other things that I was trying to impress on her but it was like hitting your head on a sliding glass door because you thought the door was open, no joke!  That's actually happened to me.  When I realized I was getting caught up in her confusion, I knew I needed to set the facts straight once and for all so I recited the Apostle's Creed, which is a summary of the Christian Faith. It says:

I believe in God, the Father almighty,maker of Heaven and Earth.
I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord,
who was conceived by the Holy Spirit
born of the Virgin Mary,
suffered under Pontius Pilate,
was crucified, died, and was buried.
He descended into hell.
The third day he rose again from the dead.
He ascended into heaven
and is seated at the right hand of God the Father almighty.
From there he will come to judge the living and the dead.
I believe in the Holy Spirit,
the holy Christian Church,
the communion of saints,
the forgiveness of sins,
the resurrection of the body,
and the life everlasting. Amen.

  Once I did that, I felt the confusion lift and my companion gracefully yoinked me out of there.  As I walked away I could hear her chanting and making all kinds of noise.

The whole rest of the night was horrible.  Sometimes I get pain in my body that moves around but usually I can control it.  This night it was uncontrollable and it was intense.  All I could do was pray for peace and relief until I could get comfortable.  Come morning, I still hadn't really slept, but I had to get up and get moving because I'd made a vow to God that I wouldn't let anything stop me from worshipping Him in the congregation.  Pretty shortly thereafter, I got a text from my sister who was with me the night before.  She had some scriptures for me that the Lord had given her.  I thank God for faithful students in Him that spend time in His word so that when the time is right, He can use them to deliver powerful words!  Powerful words from God break the chains of bondage!  I'm so thankful for people that love being used like that for God!  Anyway, one of those words came to me on this morning and it was no accident that the experience we shared with the woman across the street the night before had been a predestined object lesson from none other than God Himself.

It's a really long story, the one from where I was, to where I'm at now, but lets just say that some of the things that I thought I knew, that I was sure were true, I now know to have been error.  It's a common thing, this error I hear, as far as I can tell.  I hear about it all the time.  People that claim to be Godly, even believe that they are absolutely in the right, teaching and leading people astray because of something that they themselves have conjured up and unfortunately "duped" people into believing.  Personally, my experience in the church is very limited, so I can only testify for myself about what I've witnessed, but I hear about it in just about every stream I spend time in.  I understand that it's all rooted in pride but it is sneaky!  We must constantly be on guard and make sure we are in His will and not acting out of our own, or doing something to please someone else.


Powerful words from God break bondage's!!  My sister spoke a word to me, between her and I, that made me realize some error in my thinking.  I am a worshipper.  I love to be in the presence of God, with music, and lyrics, and all that mushy gushy love song type stuff.  I can worship God in my home, in the congregation, anywhere, but I love to lead.  It's something that God put in me that I can't escape.  I've tried.  There have been three times where I've had to step down from the platform to correct and maintain my relationship with God.  I wasn't removed, nobody told me to step down, it caused inconvenience for those on my team but it was entirely necessary for my stability. When called back, I'd fall into a net of fear. The thought would say  I was putting myself at risk if I picked up my talent again.  I felt vulnerable and susceptible to being attacked by the enemy because of the good work I was doing for God.  Pretty soon, because I had allowed that spirit of error to enter my mind, I was fighting battles that had already been won.  The thought said that the attacks from the enemy were because of the good works I had done for God.  That was a lie.  The attacks would have come anyway, but not because of anything I had done.

How does all this tie in?  Well, the prayer meeting I was at, I was asked to play and sing for.  I haven't sung and played with instruments and others for months now other than in my own home,  (which in my opinion, is where the best worship happens) My first response was absolutely, no.  That would be entirely too risky, I've dealt with a lot over the past few months and putting myself in that position, even for a few hours, was terrifying.  However, I couldn't stop thinking about it all day long.  I prayed and prayed and prayed until finally I decided I should at least sing.  I was terribly nervous at first, especially since it was just myself and one other person, but by the time we got to the last song, I felt completely free. All the insecurity that I felt had been pushed out of the way and I was free.  Completely free.  It was right after that meeting that we encountered the woman across the street.  The woman cursed me and called me names.  She was not a Christian like I thought she was.  She was bent on the spirit of error and made false accusations against me.

I felt cold and sick on the way home and so my sister followed me.  I asked her if that attack was because I stood up and sang?  Really, this is what I've been believing ever since I discovered I could sing!  She said no, of course not, but the thought remained in my mind because of what I've believed for so long. I couldn't sleep all night, I was tossing and turning in pain.  I thought the attack was because I had put myself on the front line and that God wanted me to see what a risky position it is.  Now I do believe that people on a platform, of any kind, have a greater responsibility, especially in the Kingdom of God but God is ENTHRONED on the praises of His people.  God loves it when we use our talents, he doesn't spank us after we use them! 

My sister told me the Holy Spirit told her we shouldn't go talk to the lady before we did but that's OK, God had a lesson for both of us.  I believe that the attack of the enemy that came at me through that woman was not because of anything I had done.  It was because of something I didn't do.  I didn't ask God first if He wanted me to go speak to the lady across the street, I just went.  My intentions were good and I think God honors that but something happened to me when I went to her.  I became confused and error began to torment me.  I wasn't safe because I'd stepped outside of what God wanted me to do.  The Lord delivered me in the middle of the Sunday morning worship service, I went to the prayer room and cried hard for a good few minutes at the realization of the lie and error I'd been living in and under for so long.  Attacks are going to come, they happen all the time to people saved and unsaved alike.  It's just part of life as long as the devil is roaming the earth. 

What I now understand is that I am free to use my talents for God, speak His word, and do His work, in any capacity that He would have me do it, and that I will be completely safe and protected, as long as I am doing it within the boundaries that He has set up for me.  There is no fear in love because greater is He who is in me than he who is in the world.  What do I have to worry about? Whom shall I fear?  His burden it is easy and His yoke?  It is light.  From now on, I can live my life free from the intimidation I believed came with my talent.  I can press in and worship Him again free from the fear that something bad will happen to me if I do.  I am free to express myself and my heart in adoration and praise, knowing that He is holding me, that I am safe and completely protected.  And when persecution comes, as promised, I can rest assured that it's not because of anything I've done, It's because of His great name and because I am a child of God!!